See what I'm doing today...

All the stuff on this blog is several years old. If you want to see what I'm doing today, check out my blogs:

blog.derekmpayne.com (personal blog)

bibanddeek.blogspot.com (family blog)

Thanks again.

That's all folks...

This is me (Derek) writing this post.  Since all the others have been written by my mother or my sisters I figured it was time I put in my thoughts.  All my Chemo treatments are finished.  All my Radiation treatments are done.  After spending nearly half of the past year in the hospital (and the other half in neutropenic quarantine) I am finally finished. 


Of course there is still much to be done.  The scans and the check-ups will probably never cease, and getting physically/mentally back in shape will be a long road.  But I'm ready to move on with my life.  After a three year hiatus I will be starting school again in January and hopefully I can find a job.  

I want to thank all of you for your prayers and support.  I honestly could not have done this on my own.  I have a wonderful family, both immediate and extended.  I have amazing friends, both at home and abroad.  I can't thank you enough.  I thought it would be appropriate to write this final post.  Hopefully there won't be any more need to update you about my health.  Once again, thank you from the bottom of my heart.

Celebrate!

Derek rang the bell at PCMC, signaling his final exit. They made a big fuss over him, of course. He's made some dear friends among the members of the staff there. We're happy he's home again. Doctors have recommended that he receive some radiation on his lungs, but Derek will make that decision after he recovers from this last chemo treatment. I can't tell you how thrilled we are to put the chemo chapter behind us and move on to new and better things (like college, spring semester). We have learned countless lessons throughout these past ten months, and we feel that our family has changed for the positive. Your faith and prayers have kept a dark and dismal cloud from settling in on us. That has made all the difference in the world. Thank you!
Now we'll see what his hair looks like when it grows back. Blonde? Red?

Final treatment!

Derek left on Tuesday for his 14th and concluding chemo cycle. (Somehow his timing has been such that every holiday has found him in the hospital!) We are told that 9 months of chemo is record time. We were originally told to plan on 12-18 months. Derek may need to have radiation on his lungs. They will discuss this with the radiologist while there, and will make those decisions later. We're praying that he will sail through this 5 day treatment with no complications, and that he can begin the healing process and move on with his life. We can't begin to thank all of you for your continued support!

August 22, 2010

It's taking longer to rebound from each treatment. It's a good thing we're near the end. On Tuesday Derek spent time at VVMC to receive platelets, then again on Friday to receive red blood cells and more platelets. We'll know tomorrow if he is finally ready for that last chemo cycle. We have wondered why he has done so well emotionally. Although this regimen has been harsh, he has been able to stay on top, keeping a positive outlook most of the time. Depression hasn't gotten in the way. We are convinced that your sincere prayers are keeping him healthy emotionally, as well as helping him heal physically. He is being carried by the prayers of those who care about him!

August 7, 2010

Dear Friends and Family,
For you who are trying to keep up on Derek's treks northward, I'm sorry. I'm lousy at updating this. By Friday he was physically able to go through another cycle, so he's now doing the 3-day thing at PCMC. He'll be home again on Monday. This is his 13th treatment (out of 14). It's taking him longer to recover between treatments, so who knows when the last one will be. We're hoping it happens before September. Thanks for hanging in there with us.
--Ever Onward, the Paynes

July 31, 2010

Well, we thought we were going back up to PCMC last Wednesday, but it had to be postponed again. He received another transfusion here in Cedar City, and is now physically ready for another cycle of chemo. Derek, Alan, and David will drive to PCMC this coming Wednesday for three days. (Sounds like a party!) Derek just sold all his rock climbing equipment, putting the "extreme sport" chapter of his life behind him. It was hard to do, but he didn't want the temptation in front of him. Since his spine may be compromised, he will look for other activities that are not as physically stressful. Biking, swimming, maybe? Definitely no marathons.

We just heard that our young friend, Erik, is cancer free. So thrilled for him!

July 18, 2010

Home again. Only 2 more chemo cycles to go! We're hoping he'll be able to go through the 13th session in two weeks. He is tired, but doing well.

July 14, 2010

Dear Friends and Family,
Just began chemo cycle #12. Derek will be in the hospital (SLC) until Monday. He has done well these past few weeks, gaining 14 lbs., staying energetic and upbeat. Our family just read the account in the Book of Mormon about Alma and his band of followers who were in bondage to the Lamanites. The Lord made their burdens light and they were able to bear them up with ease. We have felt this happening in our family. Derek has felt that either his burdens have become lightened or he has been strengthened and more able to bear them. He has discovered that he feels pain and discomfort differently, that the same pain that he rated as a "10" six months ago, he would rate maybe a "3" or "4" today.
Truly a great blessing!

( Mosiah 24: 14-15, Book of Mormon)

June 30, 2010

Derek has finally been given the O.K. to go back up north for treatments, after three weeks of low blood counts. He and my parents left early this morning. While up there he will be scanned (CT scan) to see if the tumor is gone. We all hope it is, but even so he has to finish out the treatments. He is doing well now, but we hope this doesn't bring more crazy side effects.
Just found out that the CT scan showed nothing in his lungs and just a tiny bit of tissue left on his spine. After this session, only 3 more to go.

June 21, 2010

New Post: just found out that Derek's blood counts are still low, so his next treatment will be postponed for another week. (Immunity is high, just the platelets are low). Now we can see why we were told in the beginning to plan on a year to complete chemo treatments. It seems that his body is taking longer to bounce back. We'll just plan on another week of good eating and good family times!

June 21, 2010

Happy Birthday, Derek!
These past two weeks have been good ones. Derek has had a healthy appetite and is making up for the weeks he couldn't eat. He managed to put on several pounds these past two weeks. He even drinks 32 oz. of a spinach smoothie every day! (I push them while I can:) He did have to receive blood last week, and will be going back to PCMC on Wednesday. While there, he will have a CT scan, which will show the state of the tumor (or hopefully, the lack of it). After all he's been through, I can't believe that a tumor can possibly survive. The fact that he has (survived), amazes me. He will also begin his 11th chemo session. This is the 3 day one. Thanks for you continued prayers, and for your investment in our welfare. We love you!

June 9, 2010

Dear Family and Friends,
Derek has only four chemo sessions to go! He finished #10 a few days ago and is home in Cedar City for the week. I spent last week at PCMC with Dave and Derek, and we had a wonderful time together. The last time I was there was during Christmas vacation for that dreadful first treatment, more than five months ago. The mood then was somber and emotional for all of us.
The contrast this past week was amazing to me. We actually had a good time, and the mood was happy and hopeful. Each day, nurses seemed to hang out in his room, spending a lot of time joking around and talking. It was fun to see the relationships Derek had with them all. A home away from home. He also enjoyed visits from some of his friends who live in the SLC area.

Good news: Derek's stomach is healing, and he is able to eat again! He will head back up to SLC this weekend. With only 4 sessions to go, the light at the end of the tunnel is growing bigger and brighter. We are hoping to be over and done by the end of August.

May 29, 2010

Derek and my parents are on their way up North today. It's close enough to Derek being neutropenic, so they wanted to be close to Primary Children's in case Derek gets a fever. Since it's happened before, they want to be near a hospital that knows what's going on with Derek. My parents and I thank Aunt Jan again for putting everyone up; we know it's not easy. We also thank everyone for their continued support and prayers. Thanks very much.

May 23, 2010

Derek received his last radiation treatment on Wednesday and is home for a week. It's been six weeks since he's been gone, and we're thrilled to have him home again.
Little did we know how hard radiation would be on his stomach. We figure it is because of the area being radiated, but it has reeked havoc on his stomach lining, so that he still can't eat. He is able to drink some water, but continues to be "fed" through the IV. The last time he ate real food was about 2 weeks ago, and will likely have to eat this way for another week or two, depending on how quickly his stomach heals. He spent the evening with a group of friends Friday and had to carry his "survival kit" (backpack of IV fluids) with him. We are so thankful for the faithful and understanding friends he has! He looks forward to being with them, and they have continued to stand by him whenever they (and he) are able.

He also underwent his 9th chemo treatment while at PCMC last week. (Five more to go, which may take until the end of the year because of delays from the dreaded side effects). At least he'll be able to eat again (we're hoping soon!) His beautiful dark eyebrows and eyelashes are almost gone and he is incredibly skinny, but he has what is most important: a humble and trusting heart, and an optimistic attitude.

Thanks to all of you who continue to care about and pray for Derek, who put his name in the temple whenever you attend, and who offer your help and service. We can't adequately express our gratitude for all your kindnesses. We love you.

May 10, 2010

Derek is being fed intravenously now, and the radiation treatments have been postponed until Wednesday. He is scheduled for chemo treatment, as well, but we'll see if they decide to go ahead with that. They actually wheeled Derek in to receive radiation today, but Dave didn't feel good about it, so he stopped the radiologist. He discussed his concerns with a doctor, who decided to postpone treatments. Derek received some red blood cells and is feeling more alive.

May 9, 2010, Sunday

I wrote just a day or so ago, but I need to add to that. Yesterday Dave took Derek into PCMC because of a low grade fever and concerns about dehydration and weight loss. Derek hasn't been able to keep any food down, or drink as much as he needs. Signs seem to indicate some damage to his stomach, from the radiation. I'm sure they will look into that. I know that Dave won't allow the next radiation treatment to take place until they have some answers. Today they will give Derek something to help the food stay down. If that fails, they will give him "nutrition" through his IV. (I doubt he has any more weight to lose...) They are also keeping him hydrated, intravenously. Another chemo session is scheduled to take place this week, but we'll see...
I asked Dave how Derek was taking all this, and Dave said, "He never complains."

I feel comforted, knowing that Dave is right there by Derek's side. I feel that he is acting on promptings as he asks questions that haven't been considered or expresses concern over decisions made. He takes personal responsibility for Derek's well-being and makes sure he is informed. Yesterday, Dave stopped the nurse from giving Derek the neupogen that had been ordered, since it was twice the amount usually given. They checked back with the doctor, who changed the order to the correct dosage. They thanked Dave for catching the error. (Dave isn't obnoxious in his questioning. He actually apologizes before he expresses his concerns:).
He said that a doctor came into the room wearing several pagers. She was covering for four other doctors!
Dave has also noticed a difference in the women doctors. Generally, they express more sympathy, take more time, and seem to pay more attention to the details.
Dave will be staying in the Leavitt's apartment this week, so he can be closer to the hospital.
Thanks, Dixie and Anne!

May 7, 2010

I talked to Derek on the phone and he asked me to "update the blog so people don't think I'm dead". Life has been so busy that I've almost forgotten about this blog. Derek left four weeks ago (can it be that long?) for radiation and chemo treatments at PCMC/LDS Hospital. He and Dave have been staying at Aunt Jan's and Uncle Don's homes throughout this time. At this point, Derek has only 6 more treatments of radiation left (yay!), so he'll be done a week from Monday. After that last treatment, he'll begin his 9th chemo session. After that (around the 19th), he may be able to come home for a week or so.

It's been almost four months since we discovered that Derek had cancer, and during this time of emotional upheaval in our family, we have become more aware of the goodness of people. Our eyes have also been opened to the serious problems that many other people are dealing with. We've realized how true it is that we should "treat everyone as if they are in serious trouble, and you'll be right more than half the time" (Elder Henry B. Eyring).

During these months, we have felt a continual peace overshadowing our home. Although we're concerned, and our prayers have become more earnest, we have never felt panic or fear. We know there is a plan, we know that Heavenly Father is in control, and we have faith that He will do what is best for Derek. We believe, as Grandpa Payne would say, "Good will come of this".

April 24, 2010

Derek's first two weeks of radiation are over; three weeks to go. His chemo treatment that was supposed to happen last week, was postponed because of the sores that seem to always appear after the 3-day regimen. These sores cause such discomfort for him that we were really hoping they would stay away this time. But come they did. Thanks to his Aunt Jan for giving Derek and Dave a home during these weeks, keeping her home sanitary (it always is), preparing healthy meals, and handling all the other stresses that come with this kind of thing. (Of course, being the Relief Society President gives her plenty of practice--or this will push her over the edge).
The radiation treatments take place at LDS hospital for only five minutes a day, and the chemo is administered at Primary Children's through an IV. So, next week when he does the week long chemo, he will be transported to LDS hospital each day for the radiation, then back again to PCMC. This doubling up of treatments will begin this Wednesday.
The good news is, because they postponed the chemo, Derek's immunity level is high, so he can socialize with friends and family. The sores are also going away, allowing him to eat "real" food, instead of drinking everything. He is in good spirits, and we are all doing well.

April 10, 2010

Home on Friday and off again on Tuesday, this time for six weeks! Derek begins radiation treatments in SLC this week, and since they overlap his chemo treatments, he will have to stay there most of the time. He will be able to attend Church tomorrow (a rare blessing these days).
We are doing well, taking one day at a time, and slowly learning to "cast our burdens at His feet".

Thanks, all you family and friends, for caring about us!